Yes, Your Daddy is a Criminal, but so is Everyone Else

The debate about immigration seems to be flaming even greater recently than usual, which was made even more obvious by the marches that were just held. In case you’ve been oblivious to the recent discussions around the nation regarding immigration, Republicans don’t know what to do, the American people are divided on the matter, and Democrats are pissed because nobody cares what they are saying.

So as I was watching the news about these wonderfully productive marches I noticed one of the most amusing signs. It stated, “My Daddy is Not a Criminal”. Let’s think about that for a second. Is he an illegal immigrant? Hmm, well it has the adjective illegal attached onto it, so I would be inclined to say yes, he is a criminal. I’m also sorry to say that every illegal immigrant in the United States is a criminal. When they wake up they are criminals, when they go to work they are criminals, and when they go to bed they are criminals. That father may be a perfectly law-biding citizen in every other way, but his mere presence in this country is illegal, and therefore he IS a criminal.

Now, what I just said might sound a little bit harsh, but it is the truth. There’s also another truth, everyone is a criminal in America. I’m sorry I had to break the news, but yes folks, you’re all criminals. You’re probably thinking to yourself right now, ‘this guy is nuts, I’m not a criminal!’ Guess what, I bet most of you break the law everyday, whether it be speeding in your car, jaywalking, spitting on the sidewalk (this actually illegal in a number of cities), or maybe even loitering (you damn whippersnappers always loitering around). So aren’t we all criminals at least to some degree? Is being an illegal immigrant more criminal than some of the criminal things we do every day?

Illegal immigration is going to happen, that’s a fact, and we Americans have been able to deal with it for quite some time now. The question is should we accommodate illegal immigrants? It seems that many Americans are empathetic towards immigrants whether illegal or not, but also understand that we can’t just allow everyone who wants in to actually come here. To me it seems that the majority of illegal immigrants come here so that they can work, and companies are willing to hire them because they don’t have to pay those minimum wages. The simplest solution to this is to crack down on all the companies that hire immigrants illegally. If there are fewer jobs available for them, they may not be willing to come over quite as quickly. My only concern with this solution is that companies may be fearful of hiring legitimate Mexican workers just because they will not want to take a chance of being investigated at all for hiring anyone who is illegal, thus making life worse for those who are already American citizens or have visas or green cards.

The people I feel who are getting the shortest end of the stick are the legal immigrants. These people have to work so very hard just to get into our country and then they have to know more than almost any state-born American knows about this country to actually become a citizen. Here they spent a lot of money in many cases and worked very hard to get into this country legally, and these illegal immigrants are undermining all of that by just waltzing their way into this country.
So here’s my final solution (I know that sounds bad) to the immigration problem. We give illegal immigrants an ultimatum. We know that we cannot deport every single illegal immigrant in America, and it would be a waste of time to do so. Also many of them obviously love this country and would love to become legal citizens. They get 90 days to take a naturalization test, just the standard one that is used for the citizenship process of green card and visa holders. They may only take the test once and after they have passed it they must take a basic English test to see whether or not they have decided to at least pick up some English and naturalize themselves with our culture. They may only take the test twice. If they fail both times then they are immediately deported back to their country of origin. This of course only work for people who do not have children. If you have children who were born in the United States or are citizens of this country then their parents are automatically given citizenship as well, of course stepchildren do not count. I know this might not be a perfect solution, but I think it’s at least a starting block towards an actual solution towards fixing the immigration problem.

Your daddy may be a criminal, but if he truly loves America and wants to become a citizen he should be given a chance, as should everyone else already living the US.

Should America Leave Iraq?

Recently my liberal friends have been raising their voices about getting America out of Iraq. I myself was against the war in the first place or at least against rushing to war. However, pulling troops out of Iraq at this stage would be like pulling a first-string quarterback out of football game in the fourth quarter just because he is sweating. It’s just bad strategy.

The Iraq war was poorly planned and executed; most people would agree with that I think. Unfortunately we are in the war and we cannot change that. You cannot go into reverse when your car is already going 60mph in drive. You could put the brakes on and wait for the car to slow down before going into reverse but if you slam on the brakes too fast the car behind you might hit you. That is how the war in Iraq is. We need to put on our brakes and eventually go in reverse and allow Iraq to be a sovereign nation. Leaving too quickly could be a cure that is worse than the disease.

Becoming a sovereign nation that can run itself is not going to be an overnight job though. It will take time. No one is sure how long it will take and that is why setting up timetables for leaving is backwards thinking. But becoming a sovereign nation also requires the people to take part of the government and control of their own military. They have taken great strides in doing this but there is a lot of work ahead and progress has been impeded by continuing insurgency.

One of the main things that need to happen is to get the international community involved in Iraq. This is not a new concept, but nothing is being done to get the world involved. If we allow the entire world help in the rebuilding of Iraq it will be a strong push against insurgents showing them that it is not just the US and UK who is behind all of this; the whole world is.

Another concern of mine is the amount of money being put into Iraq. What happened to the idea that Iraqi oil would pay for all of our troubles? Somehow the government has to find a way to balance fighting a war and paying for war. The best way to do this would have been to get the international community involved in the first place to share some of the costs of rebuilding. Of course America has the money to do all of this, but is it really worth it to the American people? To continue our campaign in Iraq we need to find secondary sources of funding since the original ones are not working. The question is whether or not the current administration will be able to accomplish this task.

So the obvious fact is that there is no simple solution the Iraq problem. But I do find that it is obvious that we should not pull out of Iraq before they can run their own government. To do so would create more problems then solve. My only hope is that our current leaders can get this job done right and bring our troops home.

Letters to Political Parties

I have never been apart of any political party. Although most of my friends and family would call me a liberal, I have never joined a liberal political party. I have decided to go straight to the source of the political parties and ask them questions that might give me an answer to which political party I would want to affiliate myself with. I am starting with the chairmen/chairwomen (not sure if there are any chairwomen) of each political party I can find.

My first target is going to be Ken Mehlman, chairman of the Republican National Committee. Bellow I have included a letter that I am planning to send to him via snail mail (I feel actual mail to be much more effective when trying to get responses from politicians then E-mail or fax). Feel free to tell me what you think and if I should add and/or omit anything from it. Keep in mind though this is a first draft so there are probably some grammatical and spelling errors I have not caught yet.

ATTN: Ken Mehlman
Republican National Committee
310 First Street, SE
Washington, DC 20003

Dear Chairman Mhelman:

I am currently writing a nonpartisan piece on varying political parties in the United States and their goals and views presently, and for the future. My goal is to hear from each chairman of these political parties and their personal views on certain matters at hand.

As you are probably well aware of, the American budget deficit and debt has grown quite large in the past several years. There are understandable reasons for some of these deficits, but how does the Republican Party plan to pay off these debts? If Republicans stay in control of the House what plans will be put into place to compensate for increased spending of the federal government?

In America there is currently a debate on Intelligent Design and its place within our public schools. What is the RNC’s stance on this issue? Should the federal government become more involved in the issue?

Abortion is a hot topic at the moment especially with President Bush’s current Supreme Court nominations. What is the RNC’s official position on this matter? Should the federal government limit abortion further or should it leave it be and let the courts handle it?

According to the polls President Bush’s approval rating has hit record lows as of late. Why do you think this is, and how should President Bush increase his standing with the public?

What is your prediction on the outcome of the 2006 midterm elections? Will Republicans keep their lead over Democrats in the House and by how much?

As an independent I would like your best reason why I should join the Republican Party.

Thank you for your time and I look forward to your response.

Sincerely,

Jon Fowler

My next letter will be to the Democratic Party. I do not plan to stop there though. So far I have contact information of the Green Party, Libertarian, and Socialist Labor Party. If there are any other parties that you would like me to write to please tell me and give any contact information you have on them.

To keep up-to-date on this letter writing campaign you can visit my blog.

Bush’s Humor Becomes Tiresome

There was a time in which I thought having George W. Bush as president wouldn’t be such a bad thing. Well, not such a bad thing for comedy that is. In truth Bush’s humor ran out four or five years ago. Every time this man speaks he says something funny, but it’s becoming predictable and bland. Please Mr. Bush, get some new material. I mean you do have some of the best writers working for you.

It became more apparent this Veterans Day during Bush’s speech that he needs a new comedy writer. You know when you hear a joke and you know it’s funny, but you’ve heard it so many times you can’t laugh at it anymore, that’s what his material has become.

My favorite joke from Friday’s speech was the one about baseless facts. You all know how that one goes. "These baseless attacks send the wrong signal to our troops and to an enemy that is questioning America's will." I know I should be laughing at this, but I just can’t bring myself around to doing it anymore. It’s just not funny anymore.

Take another example, "It is deeply irresponsible to rewrite the history of how that war began." Now this one did make me smirk a bit, but I should be laughing my ass off.

Maybe I’m just becoming too depressed of the fact that none of this is actually a joke. This man is serious. The fact that he is serious about what he says used to add to the comedic factor, but nowadays I find myself barely acknowledging the humor behind what Mr. Bush says.

I used to also think that this whole war thing that he’s been building on was just part of an elaborate act, but I haven’t seen the joke behind it yet. Maybe it’s one of those Andy Kaufman types of jokes where you don’t realize it’s funny until later. I sure do hope that punch line is coming up soon.

Perhaps twenty or thirty years from now we’ll get the joke. I mean we’re still waiting for the punch line form the Vietnam War and that thing ended a while ago.

Washington I-901 Passes With Flying Colors

In the local Washington State election voters passed I-901 which makes illegal to smoke within “public” places. This includes privately owned establishments. I’m not a smoker myself, but I believe in a free market. I voted I-901 down and I implored other to do the same. It is one thing to limit where people can smoke but to completely illegalize it in places that are not truly public is going too far. I think DJ No Name on local radio station 107.7 The End put it best. He pointed out that everything in Seattle is so close together that this law would make it very difficult to smoke even outside. Another point is that businesses that want to make non-smoking sections, but don’t have much room to do so under the 25 foot rule have to completely ban smoking in their establishment. The fact is that a free market will take care of this problem of indoor smoking. If there is market for having smoking free establishments, then the business will take care of it. Something like 75% of restaurants and bars in the state of Washington already have banned smoking and most that still have smoking have non-smoking sections. I think this initiative went too far and I’m sad to see my fellow voters decided to pass it.

On a positive note I-912, I-330, and I-336 all were voted down. At least Washington voters decided rationally on most of the issues.